I’ll tell you what, I really enjoy healthy debate. And sometimes its even better when you’re overhearing it, rather than taking part. I’m sat today in the town centre’s library cafe, working away on a job application, but I’m thoroughly – and enjoyably – distracted by the lively debate taking place on the table beside me. One of the men – who has been here the longest – has been reading Matt Haig’s ‘Reasons to Stay Alive‘ which is the reason for this debate now. I can only suspect these men are in their sixties, perhaps early seventies, and I only provide an observation of their age as a reference point and context for you as a reader. I love that people actually have these debates, they’re clearly not strangers and they are definitely not in prime agreement with one another but they are listening to each others’ viewpoint. “Cell division”; “nothing can be destroyed”; “energy takes another form, life will take another form”.
I’m now completely distracted and off task but I have several hours before I am needed again. This group has got even more interesting in the last few moments as another fellow sits down to join them. They are four very different men. I’m honestly so intrigued. Can I join this conversation?
I’m always fascinated by how others retain so much knowledge as to recount stories and memories to others through words, and I long to have a brain that does that but thus far in my life it doesn’t. The new member of the group has politely asked to interject and that’s piqued my interest. I’m in and out of understanding the conversation now, my clacking keyboard layered over the deep tones of their voices, all heavily emphatic and accented in their own ways. I love language. I love communication. I love words. I love voices. This conversation of four very different looking fellows would make a very interesting scene of a film or novel. Maybe I have been reading too much Albert Camus and his infinite level of description.
Considering I was overwhelmed and anxious this morning, I’m now feeling quite like myself. There has been a considerable shift this last week where small things are bringing me back to myself. I’m leaning into things I enjoy, I’m engaging with narratives, I’ve had so many chances to be around art. In between the rainy days, the sunlight has been magical. It’s unfurled my creativity; I’ve been creating content again and look here, I’m writing again. It’s less daunting to express myself… That feels like such growth after what I’ve been experiencing this year.
I’m not yet sure how I feel about shorter-form written content so ending this post here, I despise. But right now I need that satisfaction of clicking publish.
Until next time. It may even be pretty soon…
Love,
Anna
kulayrosas 